As of March 22nd, 2012, it’s been 1 year and 11 months since my little brother, who preferred to be called Aiden, though his legal name was changed to William Aiden Rivera-Schaeff. In the early hours of the morning on April 22nd, 2010, Aiden committed suicide. I, among countless others, havent been the same since that day. Aiden showed me that my life was worth living and I would not be alive if it wasnt for him. When I met Aiden at the lgbt youth group i help form in Montgomery County, Maryland, I knew he would change my life forever.
Aiden, born Caitlin Rivera-Schaeff, quickly developed a close bond with me. We were both not out as transsexuals at the time(I was 15 and he was 14). A few meetings at our support group me and him had a conversation that changed everything.
"Do you sometimes feel as if you were suppose to be a man? like maybe you were born wrong…." he said to me. At that moment sparks flew. I had never met someone who felt the EXACT same way as I. I told him that was exactly as I felt and we were inseparable ever since.
He was the only one besides a select few who knew this secret about me. His parents, Cathy Schaeff and Patty Rivera(who were like second parents to me), wanted their now son to be happy and did what they could to support him. I, on the otherhand, did not find that my mom and sister would accept as easily. I transitioned to Clarke to friends, but it wasnt enough. I was still so depressed and I had no self acceptance that I became extremely suicidal. Aiden, being him, noticed and told me this
"Clarke, you are my brother, and we are in this together. I lean on you and you lean on me. If you dont tell your family, your self acceptance will harm you to the point where i will lose you. I cannot and will not let that happen."
That was the moment we made a promise to eachother. Never leave the other behind. Never commit suicide. Our bond was too strong.
One thing about me, I NEVER break my promises.
The day I learned of his suicide, it broke me. At first I was angry. He was tortured day in and day out about having to go though a life long journey to become himself. He changed his name and was one testosterone injections. Then, I remembered…
He made me promise as I did to him…
The hurt took over. I forgot my anger and could think of nothing more than losing my brother.
I now intent to keep my promise to him, even if he broke his. No matter what, things will get better.
R.I.P. William Aiden Rivera-Schaeff
May 25, 1992 - April 22nd, 2010
its been 4 years since you left this world. I love you and miss you so much. So many people know your story and you live on in ever single person i see touched by you in one way or another. I love you so much. Rest in peace.
There you go!
Cute Joa and Dylan for my 200+ followers!
Thank you~! <3
(well it will not grow grow, it’s one of those vampire things…)
Last time I drew my characters with short hair people lost their shit. Totally.
But it’s just so fun.
"Just a little longer-"
"Joa I have an essay to finish."
I’m listening to HIM again~
When Joa finally gets a chance to hold him close without it being awkward he wouldn’t wanna let go :’)
View high res so it won’t be so smudgy.
"Rain coming, Del. Hood on.”
I dunno if this ever happens in the game or not.
To all trans people
Whether you’re out and proud, totally stealth, still in the closet, or struggling to find the identity that is your truth,
Thank you so much for existing. You’re so important.